Thankfulness- part 2

Today was an incredible day. At three o'clock, I never would have guessed it, having a complete emotional breakdown while driving down the road (which, by the way, is a bad idea. Don't drive whilst sobbing.). But once I got to my destination- church (surprise, right?), things turned around. Which is why church is number 2 on my list of things to be thankful for.

My church was the first place I ever felt truly accepted by Christians. Now, that's actually saying something because I've been in a church almost every Sunday since I was born, and I've never gone to public school- but that's another post for another time. When I started going there, I was definitely not a Christian. I hated God, and I thought that God hated me- which is the farthest thing from the truth. After going there a few weeks, I realized that they weren't judging me- that was new. I may have been decked out in black every day, listening to awful angsty teen music, but they knew I had real problems. At that point, I was extremely depressed. I was cutting myself, starving myself, abusing my perscriptions because I felt like I needed to fill some sort of void. At this church, I found it. It was God. It's always been God, and it will always be God. His love is something I can't even describe, and this verse sums it up pretty well:

"But I call this to mind, and therefore I have hope- Because of the Lord's great love for us, we are not consumed, for His compassions never fail." (Lamentations 3:21-22).

It's my favorite verse because I've seen it so much in my life. To put it bluntly, without Christ's love, I would be dead. Not just spiritually, but literally dead. I would have either comitted suicide or starved to death. Because of Jesus, I wasn't consumed by those things, or by anything else. Christ's love and mercy are the things I am most thankful for, but I don't know if I could have discovered them without my church. They understood my pain, and they helped me through it- they didn't ignore it as so many others had. I would be a completely different person without that church, if I was even alive at all. Being there has shaped me into a better, happier, healthier person than I ever could have imagined when I first walked into that building 2 years ago.

Thankfulness

Today, I was thinking about Thanksgiving, and how excited I am for all the food. But I realized that I honestly have so many things to be thankful for. Everyone I know has a ton of reasons to be thankful, but it's hard to name them.

So I challenged myself.

I'm going to post something I'm thankful for every day until Thanksgiving (November 24), starting today. It's only twenty. I have way more than that. I think we all do.

This means today is my 'pilot' post! Another awkward first post! yayy!

PS- This list isn't cryptic. There's no order or secret meaning, I'm really not that clever. I'm just thankful.

#1- School

I am so incredibly thankful for my school. It's where I spend the majority of my time, and I honestly wouldn't have in any other way. I realize that I'm really priveleged to be going to a private Christian high school, and it's an incredible experience. This school helped me learn to battle depression, and they even gave me the opportunity to spread awareness about it through a Chapel. I've spoken in Chapel one other time, which is honestly just a good thing to learn how to do. Public speaking is one thing in front of a class of 15 or 20, it's an entirely different thing in front of 650 of your peers. We have completely unique events, like homecoming week (which has basically nothing to do with a dance- gasp!), service projects, a fine arts WEEK this year (which I am SO excited about), and an award-winning theatre program. It makes me kinda sad that I'm realizing everything that's so amazing at this school now that I'll be leaving in less than a year, but I have that time to cherish it, and make the most of it. Without my school, I'm convinced that my life would be completely different, and I am so grateful for the person high school has shaped me into through a community of awesome teachers, peers, and fellow Christians. I honestly don't want to brag- private school ends up with quite the bill after 4 years- but if I'm thankful for anything, it's my school and all of the opportunities it's given me.